How do I stop trying so hard?

So I am still reeling from the fact that I met a convicted pedophile this past week through online dating. I go online and look at all these profiles of different men and I find myself sick of looking at them but yet I continue to do so. I pray for God to send me a nice, Christian man who will help me in my walk with God, who will be compassionate, loving, loyal, and strong. I am looking for honesty, dependability, affection and my soul mate.  I spent some time with friends and family yesterday and I told them I was open for referrals because the route I have been taking is not working for me. They all said they have been trying to think if they knew anyone and they couldn't think of one nice man that they would introduce me to. I know that there are still nice men out there who are available but where are they? One of my friends said that I am just trying too hard and need to stop looking both physically and mentally. I hadn't thought about that before but I guess I am mentally trying too hard as well. I just don't know how to turn that off.  I guess I struggle with that in not only romantic relationships but in friendships as well.
I have been trying to maintain a friendship with the bachelor that I broke up with after we had dated for close to three months. I guess I really fell for this guy while we were dating even though I know he wasn't the one for me. We have so many of the same likes and dislikes and I felt so comfortable with him. Well, when I broke up with him, we stopped talking for a while but this really bothered me because I missed his friendship.  I finally broke down and sent him an email and he said he still wants to be friends with me. I was elated but didn't know how to go about being a friend with someone whom I had been romantic with in the past. I tried to send emails or texts to see how he was doing and the responses have been minimal. I guess this isn't all too different from when we were dating either. He's not too great with communication. We do sit next to each other in church if we show up at the same service time but again, conversation is minimal and difficult to do in church. I am trying to make as much conversation as I can but he makes it difficult. He hasn't asked to see me outside of church and we will go for days without any communication. This just isn't how I think a friendship should work and I guess this is part of why I broke up with him in the first place. I called him the other day to check on his family and we had a fairly good conversation so I asked him which church service he would be attending today so I could try to be at the same service. He told me he didn't know because it would depend on how late he stayed up on Saturday night. He just wouldn't commit to a time and then I didn't hear from him for several days. He did finally text me last night and finally mentioned which service he would be at so I told him I would try to be there too. We sat together, talked a little, and when it was over, he told me to have a good week and left.  I just feel like I am trying too hard to be friends with him when maybe he really isn't comfortable with being friends with me. I took him at his word that he wanted to be friends but his actions say otherwise.
I guess I should just back off from contacting him for a while and see how it goes.  I guess I should do that with all of these men who send me texts from time to time but never want to see me. I try so hard and don't get the same effort in return.
I'm going to meet bachelor #20 tomorrow for coffee after work. If this one doesn't turn out decent, I think I will throw in the towel for awhile.